There is not much new or exciting to talk about in the gaming world so far this week so I thought I would take this opportunity to talk about one of the most upright characters you will ever find in any video game. The name of this great hero (or villain if you wish) is Krotchy, one of the most noteworthy stars of the ever popular POSTAL Series. Not too tall but pleasantly plump, he is a real stand-up kind of guy. Krotchy is always ready to bubble over with his excessive energy. He is fast on the draw and might be a bit quick on the trigger when he gets himself in a tight spot, but he doesn’t let that get him down. Krotchy is a brave little man and a straight shooter. It might not be too wise to mention how fast he is to his face. Krotchy can be a bit touchy and may take it the wrong way. He can go off half cocked if you don’t handle him just right and you could find yourself in a sticky situation. We probably think about Krotchy more than we should because his performance can be unpredictable, but he can be a handy guy to have around if you want some fun. With his good looks and devilish smile, he attracts the ladies like a magnet. Mothers might call him the root of all evil because their daughters are always sneaking away to play with him. He is a cute little squirt and the girls especially like stroking his gleaming bald head and feeling how firmly built he is. Sometimes he acts like a real jock and you want to strap him down but when he behaves, he is outstanding. Krotchy is a guy you could take out almost anywhere in public without causing a riot or attracting a disapproving crowd. It’s doubtful anyone would even notice him when he takes it easy and relaxes a bit. His worst fault could be that he doesn’t believe in overdressing. I have heard he sometimes wears a raincoat but I’ve never seen it. Usually the only article found on Krotchy is his gold initial which he wears on a thick chain at the base of his stubby but sturdy neck. This might lead some people to think he is mostly nuts. That doesn’t stop him from getting a lot of admiring glances when he does the town. Waitresses especially love Krotchy even though he can be a bit sloppy at times. There is always a generous sized tip by the messes he leaves.
Krotchy may have a bit of bad temper and killer instinct but that may have been brought on by neglect. Believe it or not, Krotchy sometimes gets lonely or needs a little reassurance so next time you see him, give him a happy little squeeze. He might not show it right away, it might take several of those happy squeezes, but he will take a great deal of pleasure out of just a little hands-on contact. It will take an awful lot of attention to soften him up though. Krotchy is used to merciless beatings and knows he is always in danger of being blown away. Krotchy. He can be a hard man to handle or a real soft and cuddly doll. A word to the wise…if you are not on his side, better keep an eye out behind you!
Remember you too can have your own “Krotchy” companion. Visit our store and you can order a Krotchy doll for yourself and maybe one to keep your girlfriends or your buddies company too. Even your mother would love him. Soft and squishy yet firm to the touch. Everybody should have a good pal like “Krotchy”.
Prepare yourselves people. Another beautiful Babe has joined our group of gorgeous gals. Our Babe of the Month, Trixy, has shining dark hair, skin like silk and long, luscious legs. One look at her pictures and she will have your eyes popping and your tongue hanging out to dry. It was a very warm day when she was photographed so of course she had to peel off those thigh high stockings and get rid of that little plaid skirt and all the rest of that hot, sticky clothing….
As a treat for you, you can read Trixy's interview below although I know the only reason you clicked on this post is to read my interesting text. Besides reading her interview, you will want to make a long and careful inspection of her artfully done photographs for yourself. You can find them by clicking her image above. Be sure you have a lot of time because once you see her you are not going to want to leave. Trixy is a real treat and you are going to want to go over her pictures again and again. When you finally do manage to force yourself away, DO NOT go to the other Postal Babes photographs. I am warning you, you just won’t be able to bring yourself to leave and are likely going to end up with the Babes all night…Actually when you think of it, that doesn't sound too bad.
1. Let’s start by you telling us a little or a lot about yourself. How old are you and where are you from? Trixy: I'm 23, and I'm originally from San Diego, Ca! I love being outdoors. Camping, off-roading, beer. I'm a girly-girl who likes to get down and dirty!
2. How did you first learn about the Postal Babes? And how does it feel to be chosen? Trixy: I actually heard about it through my good friend, Remy. It feels great to be chosen! All of the women on the website are so beautiful and sexy!
3. Ok let’s get personal. What type music do you listen to? Trixy: I listen to literally almost everything. Music is so versatile and unique. There is always something to match your mood
4. What’s your astro sign? Trixy: I'm a Virgo, the virgin
5. Are you a gamer? And what’s your favorite game (doesn’t have to be a video game) ? Trixy: This is going to be a bummer, but I'm not! The only gaming system I've ever really gotten into was the old school Nintendo. Super Mario brothers, Strider, Tetris. Oh yeahhhhh, haha.
6. How old were you when you lost your virginity? Please tell us about it. Trixy: Oh this story, haha! It was so awful and fun at the same time. I was 16 and was at my boyfriends house. His parents were home but I wanted to take it a little further.... So we ended up sneaking outside and started getting crazy in the bed of his truck. It was super hot and sexy, but the fact that all we had to lay on was a blanket made it pretty uncomfortable.
7. What’s your favorite color? Trixy: I have two! Black and neon green. Do certain colors make you hot? Trixy: Any color can make me hot if the right person is wearing it;)
8. Tell us about your modeling and acting career. What is your motivation? What do you like most about it? Trixy: Actually, this is the only modeling I've done so far! I love how fun and empowering it is. It's a great way to just be free and feel sexy.
9. I’m sure a lot of our male fans would love to know what gets you hot. Please feel free to open up and share your desires with Postal fans around the world. Trixy: This could turn out to be a long list! I love dressing up and teasing my partner. Something about knowing how hot I'm making him really turns me on. I also really like playful sex. Role play, rough sex, sex in random places...you've got to be able to keep me interested!
10. What type of guys do you like? And If you like women too, please answer for both. Trixy: I like really genuine, down to earth guys who have that sexy bad boy streak! I like guys who can show me a good time but can still make me think
Now please choose ONE answer that best describes who you are!
1. Oral or Anal Trixy: Oral.
2. Ink or no Ink Trixy: No ink.... For now;)
3. Black or White Trixy: Black.
4. Money or Love Trixy: Love.
5. Teacher or Student Trixy: Student
6. Men or Women Trixy: Men
7. Fly or Drive Trixy: Drive
8. Prayer or Sin Trixy: Prayer
9. Music or Games Trixy: Music. I'm a huge music junkie.
10. Liberal or Conservative Trixy: I walk a fine line between the two...
The welcome announcement of the Steam Console in development means that soon you will be able to play POSTAL 1 and POSTAL 2 from the comfort of your own living room (or wherever you care to stick your consoles). You don’t actually have to wait though; you can bring POSTAL to your living room today. Uwe Boll’s POSTAL movie sequel may be a bust, but his first POSTAL movie was a gem worth watching over and over again. We now have POSTAL the movie in all its gore and glory available in our store*. This movie, for reasons obvious or not, is incredibly hard to find for sale. I know I personally did some heavy scouting around and tried to buy a copy for myself but didn’t have any luck grabbing hold of it. I am pretty sure it must have been banned in my area. All is not lost though. Now for a limited time only you can get POSTAL the movie on DVD for just $5. Watch all the fun in its standard definition splendour! Better yet, It’s the UNRATED version so it’s even more offensive to the snobby stuck up set!
You don’t like standard definition DVDs? You like the ability to practically see the pores of the actors and actresses? Well then, you are in luck. We also have the even rarer UNRATED Blu-ray for sale too. Get them while they last. The Blu-ray is only 5 easy payments of $29.95 and they are going like hotcakes, but wait!!! Order within the next 20 minutes because you know we can’t do this all day (at least not until the next time our ad runs again which will be about 15 minutes from now), you can get the Blu-ray for just $5! That’s right…same price as the DVD! High Definition POSTAL! See it all as if you were actually there! Fun Fact: Vince was actually there so keep an eye out for him!
So let’s sum this up. You can get the UNRATED DVD or UNRATED Blu-ray for the insanely low price of $5! You can’t go wrong at that price! Still not convinced? Well when you buy the DVD or the Blu-ray you even get a bonus copy of the classic non-steam POSTAL 2 right inside the case! For only $5 you get both POSTAL the movie and POSTAL 2 the game. What are you waiting for? Operators are standing by! Want a money and friend saving tip? Buy everyone you know a copy for their birthday/anniversary/Christmas etc. That way you save on shipping and won’t look like a jerk for forgetting their special occasion!
About the movie: Prepare yourself for the hilarious, laugh-packed comedy POSTAL, the irreverent and outrageous film based on the popular video game. After a clueless slacker named the Postal Dude (Zack Ward) loses his job, he joins his shady Uncle Dave (Dave Foley) and a bevy of big-breasted, scantily clad female cult followers in a scheme to steal a shipment of hot new toys. First they must foil a band of ruthless terrorists led by none other than Osama Bin Laden (Larry Thomas). Their antics and actions to save the world from destruction and the toys from Bin Laden in this offensive, mayhem-ridden laugh riot threatens the very limits of common decency.
We doubt that we will be able to keep the movie in stock long at these prices because we don’t have that many to begin with. The fact that we are practically giving it away at these unbelievably low prices means it is going to sell out fast so order now and don’t miss out or you will regret it.
While you are shopping in our store, why not pick yourself up a t-shirt! They come in both charcoal and crimson, most sizes are still available! The shirts were made using Next Level 60/40 Cotton Poly blend making them our most comfortable shirts ever! Get them while they last! (Purchasing Tip: Get both colors that way you don’t have to choose!)
Are you lonely and need a hand to hold? Buy yourself a Krotchy Doll! Krotchy Dolls are half plush, half beans...ALL BALLS! Krotchy is 8 inches tall. (Sack size is 6 inches tall, and feet are 2 inches long) totaling 8 inches of pure ballsackary! (Reality Tip: Krotchy is inanimate and won’t tell your secrets to anyone)
Want to show off your RWS fandom? Get an official RWS metal sign for your bedroom, office, games room and/or anywhere else you want to stick it. For just $10 you can get the regular “Shoot it yourself” sign. For $5 more ($15), you can get the pre-shot version. These real metal Running With Scissors signs were ACTUALLY shot by one of the RWS Team! WARNING: The bullet holes are really FUCKING sharp so be careful when holding these things! (Medical Tips: Shooting a sign can be dangerous fun! If you accidentally pop an eyeball out with a rebound from shooting it yourself, or slice a finger or anything else off while holding the pre-shot sign, don’t say we didn’t warn you!)
Are you a prankster? Buy a RWS sign and change the pedestrian crossing signs with Running With Scissors signs! (Legal Tip: Don’t actually do that)
Are you like me and prefer boxed copies of games rather than just digital? Get yourself the Fudgepack! Our first pack of every game we ever created! Give the gift of FUDGE to your friends or buy it for yourself and experience POSTAL Classic and Uncut, POSTAL 2 Share the Pain, POSTAL 2 Apocalypse Weekend, Eternal Damnation AND MORE!! It contains pretty much everything POSTAL-y up until the Steam release. (No Steam code included)
I was all for buying this the moment it hit Steam until I read about their Kickstarter tactics. I've been a Carmageddon fan way before I even played Postal, but changing the rules after people have payed for tiers they believed would land them the full game and announcing paid DLC plans before the game even goes into beta, is just pure money grabbing greed and sounds to a lot of people like they're just trying to bleed their only respected IP dry of all it's worth. Changing their mind when people got upset only goes to show they realised it was a bullshit move too.
Carmageddon is great and I'll always love the games (I even enjoyed TDR). But playing with the hearts of your true die hard fans (and that's the ONLY people they are messing with here), is not something I wonna put money into.
What they should have done is taken a leaf from RWS' book and released an improved version of the existing game with achievements and multiplayer, updated and fixed the game and THEN thought about releasing free DLC / paid expansions / HD textures etc. However what I really believe they're gonna do is charge people for single maps/cars like some sort of Carma of Duty game.
It was really a misunderstanding which I tried to make clear in this post. If you played the original, you are likely aware of the Splat Pack. Buying the original didn't entitle you to the Splat Pack. The Max Pack gave you everything (which is what is on GOG now). Which is basically what they were saying. You could buy the Original Vanilla OR you could buy the "Max Pack" version which is basically the game and a Season Pass. There were no tricks, most of the problems arose due to Stainless being very accommodating and listening to the requests of their fans which messed up other things. The announcement that they intend keep the game fresh through DLC is much better than just releasing it, then abandoning it. Stainless never mentioned, that I recall, that backers would be entitled to all DLC, just that backers would get all episodes and not just the first one for backing.
If anything Stainless should be commended for going beyond what they promised in the Kickstarter by giving everyone the Season Pass too.
Members of the public: You now have one minute to reach minimum safe distance! Anyone who has played a Carmageddon game is likely familiar with the Wheel Spin maneuver. Hitting that hot-key during the countdown lets you start the race a few seconds early and a few dollars short. You can make up for this by running over the guy doing the countdown for the race. Something like that happened unexpectedly to Stainless very recently. Stainless started the countdown for the release of their upcoming Carmageddon: Reincarnation. Instead of the long awaited sigh of relief that the game was almost ready, Kickstarter backers pulled a wheel spin on them and attempted to mow them down. Since they had all been clamouring for a release window, why didn't the backers react in the positive way that was expected? The reason was simply that once again the Kickstarter campaign's wording left a bit of unintentional ambiguity but Stainless's ultimate response to it was commendable. To really appreciate this let me tell a story of the Matrix. Backers were given the choice between taking the red pill or the blue pill... wait wrong Matrix. When the Kickstarter Campaign first launched, there were set tiers, and like a traditional Kickstarter tier most said it includes all previous tiers. That's great, you just move up the tiers until everything you want is included in the tier you select. Everything seemed to be well organized and well planned for the Kickstarter. I originally backed it for $50 to get my two copies with the exclusive Kickstarter custom Eagle complete with an active chainsaw running across the top of it.
I selected that tier because it sounded cool and a friend of mine who couldn't fund Kickstarter directly wanted in on the action and later increased my way up to higher tiers until I ran out of funds to give. At the time there was no other way to get a second copy other than the $50 tier without rebuying with a different Kickstarter account. People asked Stainless to add a cheaper two pack, and Stainless listened. Enter the $30 two pack. It's always great when a company listens to the wishes of its fans but here is where all the trouble began. You see the $50 tier said you get an additional copy of the game and all previous tiers, which before the $30 tier was introduced, meant you got two copies. People joining late became confused and thought they got three copies for $50 (the two from the $30 and the extra one from the $50.) The Reward Matrix was released to try to clear things up, although many backers missed it and are still confused about the number of copies they get. Then there was the DRM controversy. The backers demanded a DRM-Free version of the game. Once again Stainless listened and said they would give it away free to anyone who backed at a level that gave a Steam key. Linux and Macs got in on the demands and again Stainless listened.
Fast forward until September 26, 2013. Stainless announced that the game would be coming out in Q1 2014 to Steam Early Access (one year behind the estimate, but hey that's what happens when you develop a game). This should have had the backers jumping for joy, instead it left them frothing at the mouth. No, they were not mad because their game was coming out soon, they were mad because the announcement mentioned that there would be Downloadable Content beyond what the Kickstarter funded (For those under a rock in a cave on a distant planet with their fingers in their ears and wearing a blindfold, Downloadable Content or DLC for short is traditionally content that expands upon the finished game, but not part of the finished game itself usually). The wording on the Kickstarter read "[...] our backers will get every update of the game as it's released, for FREE. You get it all for the minimum “get the game” pledge of $15. You get to download the first release via Steam, and your updates will occur automatically after that." What you have to realize is that Carmageddon: Reincarnation was going to be released in an Episodic way to get the game out faster. The backers would get each episode until the final game was released turning their copy in to the full version, which were the updates the Kickstarter referred to. Stainless eagerly announced at the same time of the Steam Early Release that after the final game was released, they wouldn't abandon it, that they would release DLC in addition to it (just like we are doing, RWS is going to give POSTAL 2 some free DLC love with DLC 1). "Awesome, so Carmageddon is going to be growing for years to come!" was the expected response. Instead angry mobs cleaned their local hardware stores out of all their pitchforks and torches and began storming Stainless headquarters. Stainless fearing for their life once again listen to their fans and said quite quickly here take all the DLC and our Wallets. Someone mentioned that Nobby offered up Sim as a sacrifice but that could just be the rumour mill talking that all Kickstarter and Paypal backers would get a golden ticket version that includes all DLC for the rest of time. The riots died down.
To date there have been 49 backer updates most of which contain snapshots of what is being worked on right now. Some of the areas receiving attention were concepts for vehicles and their mostly completely versions, track re-imaginings, classic footage from when the game was originally being made and various other things going on in general such as Batwick’s fun in the official Carmageddon: Reincarnation race car. Likely the best update to date has to be this one below. As you can see, working on the game is serious business. That isn't all they have been working on though, Stainless also re-released a spiffed up copy of the Original Carmageddon on to mobile devices and re-released a classic version on to GOG. There is no reason or excuse not to play the Original in some form or another. For those that are now curious to see all these updates or who just like to see a game come to life, some of the updates have been made public so you can view them for yourself here
Now why is all this on our website? Running With Scissors and Stainless go way back, at least as far back as before POSTAL III. You see back in the day Stainless was going to work on POSTAL III, but some things happened and other things didn't happen. In the end, like it or not, Akella did it in the end instead. That's not all though, both POSTAL and Carmageddon date back to the same era. They both have roots in bygone days when games had heroes in green tights who calmly saved the world without shedding a drop of blood. Plumbers moonlighted as heroes and for some reason hedgehogs could run really fast. Games were reliably family friendly. It was all to remain a bit lacklustre until one fateful day the Dude showed up in town and created some excitement by shooting up the place. At another location, a certain fast hedgehog tried to warn the world but was too slow for the Eagle and was left as a bloody stain covered in the leavings of a frightened cow. Since we are good friends and all, and fans of each others games, we figured we would come here and share an announcement Stainless made.
Just to reiterate, Carmageddon: Reincarnation is coming to Steam Early Access in Q1 2014. The game is currently slated to enter beta a little sooner for the backers than the rest of you, but not by that much. You will also get to make a choice. Do you want to buy the Standard Version, which will get you the full game, or do you want to buy the super ultra deluxe spectacular golden and likely drawn on by Sim Full Package version. The Full Package will contain every DLC that will ever be released for Reincarnation other than maybe the Kickstarter exclusive Chainsaw Eagle skin which will likely remain exclusive to the Kickstarter (otherwise I can see torches being lit again). It's still not too late if you want to back the project which should qualify you to get the Full Package version! If you can't wait to play Reincarnation, you can pick up the Original Carmageddon on GOG or for your mobile devices from Google Play and iTunes. For the next week you can get the Android version of Carmageddon from the current Humble Bundle too!
Here are some concepts and other fun images:
The new Eagle design for Carmageddon: Reincarnation
An alternate Eagle Concept for Carmageddon: Reincarnation although the first one will be the one used for the game.
Now where have I seen that done before? Hands up all those that have played Grand Theft Auto V and hands up all those who have noticed how blatantly Rockstar Games… hmm…should I say totally ripped us off or should I say paid homage to us by almost carbon copying our games. In some scenes it looks like they are actually advertising for us by telling you the right thing to do is “Go Postal”. That message directing you to our game is clearly written on the side of their vehicle.
It also comes as no surprise or coincidence that included in their game is a dog named "Chop" which is quite obviously modeled after our "Champ" even has a similar collar. No other conclusion could be drawn about the dog although of course Chop could never be the masterful beast Champ was.
If that isn't proof enough, could that be a gas can they are using....one that you can take and pour the contents on the ground then ignite into deadly flames? I do believe we have seen that before. Yep, pouring and then igniting gasoline on the ground to burn things/people is totally stolencopied a tribute to POSTAL except we do it in a far more classy, far more realistic way. We want some extra fun in our games so our NPCs actually run around screaming while they are on fire and give us a laugh before being burned to a blackened crisp. What a hoot! They don’t just get hit and boringly fall over. We believe strongly in realism not just in cheap gimmicks. Plus we think to provide you with a box of matches which can be quietly lit rather than forcing you to waste an overly loud, cop attracting bullet just to ignite your gas spill.
Still not convinced? Take a look at the Go Postal van tire from the trailer. Do they maybe use Bad Year tires or Nitro Tires? Nope...they use Atomic tires!!! As many of you know, POSTAL 2’s week ends with a bang, an Atomic Bang! Right next to the tire is a slogan that says “We aim not to lose it” and right beside the slogan is a very prominent capital P… for our POSTAL? Is that an inference that POSTAL Dude may have “lost it” when he blew up Paradise with an Atomic bomb or is it just that since POSTAL had something Atomic in it, they wanted something Atomic too?
Moreover, Trevor’s story starts out at an old beat up trailer in hot and dusty desert country which sounds a lot like where POSTAL Dude’s story begins, sounds exactly the same in fact. What about Michael or Franklin? Both of them just wanted to go quietly about their business. They didn’t want to bother anybody and didn’t want anybody bothering them but society with its dirty tricks and barely hidden undercurrent of evil had other plans for the unsuspecting pair. Through no fault of their own, they were going to get screwed over. Franklin was working for a credit frauding used car salesman without realizing what was going on. Michael's son was an unsuspecting victim of the fraud. Who do they remind you of? Let me think now... Somehow they are just a little too reminiscent of a certain leather clad guy who just went out to mind his own business and quietly check things off his innocent To-Do list but ended up getting jumped on by a bunch of self-serving hypocrites and various other moronic but deadly society types? I can bet the Dude never dreamed one of the unexpected things that would happen to him in his already screwed up life is that he would be cloned. That's right, looks like they basically took the POSTAL Dude's life and just put in a few twists and turns to alter it just a little to suit themselves and their game! When you think about it, GTA V might have been pretty lame or may not have existed at all without going POSTAL.
One thing GTA V didn't borrow from us is the Stock Market mini-game feature where the actions the player takes affect the value of stocks for various companies for either good or bad. I wonder if the value of the Go POSTAL stocks in the game will rise once we release DLC 1 for POSTAL 2.
This article will be expanded upon as new things they "borrowed" from us are discovered. Did you see a POSTAL ref in GTA V or any other game? Let us know in the comments! Click the GTA V poster at the top of this post or click one of these to buy yourself a copy of POSTAL and POSTAL 2!
With Uwe Boll's POSTAL 2 (the Movie) Kickstarter clogging up the news pipes, it is time for us to make a little news of our own with highlights and plans for our own POSTAL 2 (the Game). For those who don't follow the Social sites or our Steam group, you missed out on an interesting post. Toploader posted an informative POSTAL 2 first DLC/Patch post to the Steam Group and sent the link around the social sites. For those of you not following us but would like to be kept informed of the latest developments, this is why you should keep checking in with us! Toploader’s post is below. It is very indicative of what we are doing now and the plans we hold for the future. We have quite a bit to look forward to once everything is set in place.
So, first DLC / Patch info. Hey guys,
We have a lot cooking for POSTAL 2 in the coming months. While I'd love to copy and paste our road map here for you all to mull over, we figured it would probably be more sensible to at first to only inform you of the additions we have up and running right now at our end.
So this is only a small part of what we have planned. We are basing our updates on fan feedback and requests. Feel free to leave your own in the comments below.
All updates will hit Steam first and be for Windows, Mac and Linux. All updates will come to non Steam versions too in time.
The fact there are around 70 achievements has already been reported. For non Steam versions they will also be available via an in game system (optional).
So we added and fixed some of the video options:
-Added V-Sync option -Added Widescreen Stretch toggle Option -Added FOV option -Fixed widescreen stretching issues regarding various things such as the map screen, hud and police wanted bar.
Now, for those wondering why we've been dragging our heels with the Achievements, it's because first we needed to work in a little something called:
A week in Paradise (AWP)
The big, and probably not totally surprising first bit of news is that we are incorporating POSTAL 2 and it's add-on, Apocalypse weekend into one game. This is of course based off of the free mod that's been around for many years, many if you will know exactly what it is but for those that don't, I'll summarize:
As well as being able to pick either game to start from, you'll also be able to pick a new 'A week in Paradise' option that will allow you to play the entire game through in one sitting. It will also add dismemberment to the entire game as well as the the 3 AW weapons.
We will also be including many weapons from the Eternal Damnation mod, so far confirmed are the ones that were part of the original AWP Mod, so the Chainsaw, Flamethrower, Baseball bat and Knuckle Dusters. Maybe more to come.
Fans of this mod will no doubt welcome this news as it means they'll not have to jump hoops to get Steam to track playtime, but also means it will all be there in Mac and Linux too out the box. Those that have never played it will get to enjoy POSTAL 2 at its best.
This is pretty much just us getting warmed up, and we'll provide further news on coming updates as and when we have them fully implemented and working our end. The AWP and achievements will make up a bulk of the first update, although there will be more.
Stay tuned and thanks as always for the support.
As informative as the preceding post was, it isn't just a re-post of that news, it's time for another set of videos.
SPOILER ALERT, the rest of this post contains pretty much the entire game as it stands now (at least Monday through Friday anyway) so if you have not played it yet you should go do that now before watching this. Basically Kamek tries to beat the entire game as fast as possible. Not really sure why someone would want to do that as that seems like it would take a lot of the random fun out of it, but these speed run things seem to be popular. I suppose when you have a backlog so long that it takes you an hour to scroll to the bottom of your list, you need to play your games as fast as possible just so you will be able to make a dent in them before you die of old age.
Well that week just flew by didn't it? Think you can do better? Make your own Speed Play video, or other amusing video and post it in the comments! We are always interested in fan creativity and some of the great accomplishments you can come up with. Let us see what you can do. Don’t forget as Toploader mentioned, feedback and requests are always welcome. Let us know your opinion of the changes and improvements.
Congratulations go out to Village People’s Cowboy Randy Jones and the love of his life software developer and composer Will Grega. The happy couple were married today, which coincidently is also Randy Jones 61st birthday, at New York’s City Hall. The three day wedding event began yesterday with Randy’s public proposal to Will in front of family and friends. The proposal took place during a New York tour bus ride interestingly enough called “The Ride” which included at stop at the Columbus Circle to watch a performance of Andrea Bocelli’s “September Amor”. Partners for 30 years, the two men wed once before on May 7, 2004 at a NYC club, however, gay marriage was not yet given legal status so the marriage was purely symbolic. After today’s ceremony, festivities took place at a trendy roof top bar with special guest host Warrington Gillette otherwise known as Jason in Friday the 13th Part 2 assisting in making their day even more memorable.
The party continues tomorrow with a post-wedding banquet in Little Italy to honor Will Grega’s Italian heritage. To add to the excitement, the eleven day long annual Italian cultural event, Feast of San Gennaro, featuring live music, street vendors and other attractions will also be taking place in Little Italy at the same time.
Randy Jones has been keeping himself busy in the Gay community speaking out against DOMA (Defense of Marriage Act) and he has also hosted the Tybee Gay Days fundraiser on Tybee Island in Chatham County, Georgia for HIV and Aids. Most of you will likely remember Randy best as the leader of the “Hell’s A-Holes” Segway “Biker” Gang in POSTAL 3. You better be out of the way when they are burning up the road. He also has a strange obsession with our man “Krotchy”. I’m not quite sure if Krotchy returns that obsession or not. I don’t think so but you never know. In any case, all the gang at Running With Scissors, Krotchy included, wish both Randy and Will a long and happy married life together. For more information, click Randy's pic above.
His own original song seemed like a suitable send off:
Seems oddly suitable for some reason:
Probably one of the Village People's most famous songs:
Wedding guest, Vince Desi, congratulates Randy Jones after his wedding in New York City.
You may have heard or may not even be aware there was actually a POSTAL movie released way back in 2007. It has a little bit of everything you would ever want to see in a movie. Naturally action packed as you would expect a POSTAL movie to be, it has hoards of outraged citizens waving weapons and shooting off guns of various calibers, some far more deadly than others, charging headlong after the innocent Postal Dude who at first is simply trying to escape. Male and female, young and old, torn and dismembered bodies are everywhere. Many of the bodies oozing rivers of dark red blood from gaping wounds and stacked up like cordwood are those of sweet little babies and tiny children which goes to even further demonize the Postal Dude in the eyes of the townspeople. Death and destruction rain down on the town of Paradise, Arizona and everywhere you look, towel wrapped terrorists are streaming out of the woodwork like swarming rats. With everyone out for his blood, the Dude has no chance to clear himself or explain his good intentions. With all the running, screaming, shooting, bombing and terrorist invasion, its hard to believe it’s actually a comedy and quite a good one at that. It also has some realistic fights and just to lighten things up a bit, some very convincing sex scenes with some babes so gorgeous they would blow your mind. The Dudes wife is also a talented babe you really must see. With some quite believable political incorrectness thrown in for added interest, POSTAL is a very likeable and entertaining comedy. Since it has been a few years since its release date, the movie may now be a bit difficult to find for sale at any of the normal outlets. If you haven’t seen POSTAL and want desperately to see it, you may wish to hit up eBay or Amazon to see if there are any copies floating around. As a special tip I will tell you, while acting out a scene as himself at one point in the movie, Vince Desi’s personality and fighting spirit really shines through. This film was written and directed by Uwe Boll. Many of you may have heard of Uwe Boll at least once or twice before as he is fairly famous for making critically panned movies. His movies sometimes even have big name stars in them including: well known English tough guy Jason Statham, very popular Canadian film and television star Zack Ward, American actor and stuntman Verne Troyer best known as Mini-Me in Austin Powers, the previously mentioned Vince Desi of Running With Scissors and of course we must not forget Krotchy and Champ. POSTAL was one of Uwe Bolls most popular films and continues to hold its own. Approximately 50% of all movies Uwe Boll signs at conventions are POSTAL.
Uwe Boll recently launched a Kickstarter in an attempt to raise funds to make POSTAL 2. Since POSTAL, the first movie, was already based somewhat loosely around the POSTAL 2 and 3 games, it will be interesting to see where he plans to take the movie POSTAL 2. With shining stars like Postal Dude, Krotchy and Champ, the potential is definitely there to make it a fun and entertaining movie and one more than just POSTAL gamers and fans would want to watch and enjoy.
From the Kickstarter : "POSTAL 2 will be a controversial comedy in which we take up current political issues. We take the biggest scandals of our democracy, like the happenings about Julien [sic] Assange and Edward Snowdon [sic] and show that there is no difference between our democracy and the prison camps in Russia or China. We show that through this massive monitoring our communication data is not safe anymore! We want to make a movie which is totally uncensored, pointed against everything and everybody, against every political party and every religion. There will be no survivors."
Uwe Boll's Kickstarter is trying to bring in $500,000 USD before Sunday Oct 27, 2013. As with all Kickstarters there are various backer levels, the more you are willing to give to the Kickstarter the more rewards you get. For backing as low as $25, you get a digital copy of the movie before it is available to the public. For $75 you receive a physical DVD copy as well as all the previous tier rewards. Fork out $500 and you can become an extra. $7500 lands you a real speaking role! There are other rewards tiers as well and some of them only have a limited number of slots available. If you are interested at all in what those slots have to offer, you should probably back sooner rather than later so you don’t miss out. The nice thing about Kickstarter is that it doesn't take you money until after the Kickstarter is successful. If the Kickstarter fails your transaction switches from pending to cancelled so you don't even need to wait for a refund... you never actually gave the money out in the first place.
We here at Running With Scissors wish Uwe Boll well for his Kickstarter and plan to watch his results with interest. If you already knew about the Kickstarter and read this post hoping to hear juicy details about the upcoming movie, we are sorry to inform you that you won't find any here. We don't know anything more than what you already know. In fact let us know if you find out something we don’t know. Uwe Boll is fielding questions for those that back the project so if you want more information, toss the project at least a dollar and ask away. You never know, if 500,000 generous people all pitch in $1 we may all get to see POSTAL 2.
To track the progress of how much has been pledged or how much is still needed to be pledged towards the making of the POSTAL 2 movie and the different levels and swag distributed for pledges, I have included a handy widget below:
Over the last few months we have been running an experiment. Astr0naut would report on news from around the Internet and Gaming in general, while we would run posts about upcoming games as well as a few posts about things loosely related to RWS in some way. While these posts were popular as was shown by the readership numbers steadily climbing, we have decided to shift focus to more purely RWS and POSTAL related news and articles here on the RWS site. We will still be running the "fluff" pieces over on the social sites, so if you have been enjoying those, feel free to hop on over to the facebook, Google or twitter and continue to enjoy them there. For those that have been enjoying Astr0naut's posts, he is making himself a blog which he will be sharing with us via the social sites as well.
We like the momentum we have with the frequently updated posts on the front page, so during times when we don't have any RWS or POSTAL related news to report we will be taking a page from the tumblr and featuring fan works here on the site. We have been digging through all the dirt that has piled up over the years and have been pulling out some videos that we particularly like. If there is anything RWS related you would like to see more of let us know.
Something RWS related is how we will start this off. Here is an average day in the office.I bet you wish you worked at such a fun place. There's nothing like a good natured whack on the head to let you know its time to get back to work and a few pats on the back to let you know what a good job you are doing.
If you want to have a real blast, join our very own MrDownerup up having fun with Grenades. They are sort of like potato chips or other tempting treats, you can't stop with just one.
Speaking of fun with Grenades, check out Mr Whitefolks's Guide to POSTAL 2 Stupidity Volume 4. Some very creative ways to use Grenades can be found within!
All this and without using any mods too! Why not give it a whirl and see what creative ways to do things in POSTAL 2 that you can come up with. Record it and send it in!
Did you make or do you know of any really funny, well made or otherwise great POSTAL videos? If you do, then send a private message to RWS and we will review it. If we like it we will use it in a future instalment of this upcoming regular column. We know there is some pretty talented people out there. Show us what you've got.
Our site header image showcases some of the leading characters of our games with a little patriotic touch kicked in for good measure. Come for the great articles, tips and information, stay for the comments useful and otherwise, but all in fun. Recently a few new and interesting things were added to the site and the forums that you may have missed. First and foremost, new emoticons! Click the “more” button under the row of Krotchys...Krotchies... Kortchi... the old set of Krotchy emoticons and you will see the brand new ones! Even more may be added later on if we don’t get lazy and forget about them. You can never have too much of a good thing.
That's right! The Steam ones, especially the pizza one, were so popular that they were added here too! It’s amazing how much fun a simple little icon can add to a conversation. Give them all a try and see what we mean.
Other changes include great new wallpaper. A variety of which can be found at the bottom of this page. There is something for just about everyone and it will likely get updated frequently, maybe even weekly (also like the emoticons, if we don’t get lazy), so check back often!
While you were visiting the wallpaper page you probably noticed the comics are now much easier to navigate. If you have not read them yet, or have not read them recently you may wish to give yourself a break and a have good laugh. Take a load off! Relax and go to check them out now!
That’s it for now but remember check back often. Show your support by reading articles and making comments. Good or bad, the more we hear from you, the more we know what you want and suggestions are always welcome…or should I say most suggestions are always welcome. You might also want to post a reminder to update the wallpaper and emoticons if we sort of forget.
In the ever expanding world of Indie Games, sometimes you need to stop and take a look at the midnight sky and see the shooting stars. You might even get hit by one of these shooting stars one day like Ethan was. Luckily rather than killing him, the meteorite gave him special powers. Now he is on a quest to try collect all the pieces of the meteorite that hit him in the first place... possibly for revenge, possibly to get more power, or maybe you will just have to play the game to find out why he is doing that. Ethan: Meteor Hunter mixes puzzles and platformers core action mechanics with an innovative mechanic: telekinesis. Ethan can pause time and move objects around in order to solve puzzles and get though levels with dynamic use of physics giving multiple gameplay and solving possibilities. What makes Ethan: Meteor Hunter extra interesting is it is a game rescued from the closure of the studio developing it. The team that had been working on Ethan thought so highly of the game that they bought the IP and the kit they needed to make it work back from Hydravision and formed their own independent studio, Seaven Studio.
A picture is worth a thousand words they say, so here is a video! This has to be worth a lot more than just one thousand words:
Still not enough to sway you? Well here have a much longer "Let's Play" style video. I would highly recommend you check this one out as it gives you a really good feel for the game. If you are sadistic, which since you like POSTAL you probably are, you also get to enjoy watching the demonstrator die repeatedly at no extra charge!
Here is a Special Puzzle Edition video for your viewing pleasure:
Starting to get interested after all those videos? Great, why not give it a try yourself. The devs have released a PC alpha demo for your enjoyment. I actually gave it a try before writing all this, so I can tell you I did find it rather fun. Let's do a recap of the features:
3 different worlds and 50 levels that will hook you for hours!
Multiple challenges: time-attack, fragment collection or minimum number of pause goals in each level
Telekinetic gameplay: players can move elements in the environment to create a path and clear his way
Classic Platformer with Physics puzzles: wide array of objects including wooden blocks that burn when they reach fire or metal blocks conductive
Collect! Search! Explore! Run! Multiple ways of playing the game through themed stages that contains many secrets!
Expressive art style and high-quality animation including 3D Animated backgrounds
Despite it not even being out yet, the game has already started to catch attention. In July 2013 it was a Finalist at the Develop Indie Showcase in Brighton, UK. So what are you waiting for, go check out Ethan: Meteor Hunter on Steam's Greenlight, give it a vote and bring their dream to Steam.
cards suck. i got the drops and then bought the remaining four. to reward my efforts i got a pizza emoticon. PIZZA? How fucking hardcore in a game with gratuitous violence raunchy humor etc etc the game shits on my face with lonely loser junk food. Nice goof rws!
Originally they were going to be Krotchy emoticons like on the forums.